I trust that in this post I am not adding to the noisy
clatter that has followed the recent passing of the marriage equality bill here
in New Zealand. Social media has been inundated with banging and clanging and
shouting and pouting; much of which has been nonsensical.
Every now and then some social, cultural, moral or spiritual
awakening or crisis challenges ones worldview.
In regards to crisis (or perceived crisis) it seems to me that there are
two sorts of Christian response. Firstly there is the response of those who
either have an over-realised sense of triumphalism or underwhelming sense of
God’s ability to continually work out his purposes in the world despite the
ways of our world. This group bemoans the fact that their ‘Christian’ nation is
falling apart and makes a whole lot of noise about slippery slopes, moral
erosion, compromise and social breakdown. Then there seems to be a second
group, Christians who understand themselves to be exiles living in a strange
land. This group is simply reminded afresh that their nation is not ‘Christian.’
For them the ship of ‘Christendom’ has well and truly sailed, they recognise
the reality our post-Christian world and are not trying to hold onto yesteryear.
They do not expect secular government, media or general culture to reflect the
way of Christ. Rather than protest, bemoan and argue, their response and
commitment is to faithfully live the life of Christ in their spheres of
influence. As Brueggemann puts it, “Exile
did not lead the Jews in the Old Testament to abandon faith or to settle for
abdicating despair, nor to retreat to privatistic religion. On the contrary,
exile evoked the most brilliant literature and the most daring theological
articulation in the Old Testament.” The truth is, if Christians might
together ‘catch up’ to our profoundly changed social circumstance, we might
proceed with a different set of presuppositions in regards to culture and also
a very different sense of urgencies. This will in turn lead to more meaningful
engagement with our contemporary culture than bemoaning “moral erosion,” or the
breakdown of society and family,” or declaring today as a “sad day for our country,”
or a day where one is “not proud to be a Kiwi.” These being simply the kinds of
comments some have made in regards to the passing of the recent marriage equality
bill. Many have said these sorts of things. Many have said a lot worse.
So what about the marriage equality bill?
I hold what would be considered a “traditional” or “conservative”
Christian position in regards to marriage and in regards to homosexuality. I
think coming to this position is a fairly straight forward procedure, however, outworking
its implications pastorally is an incredibly complicated challenge. I don’t
think the Church has done particularly well in this area. This is a discussion
for another time however. Now, when it comes to the marriage equality bill. Firstly,
I’m of the position that we now live in a post-Christian society. Secondly
then, to oppose something in a public forum based on the Bible and using
biblical texts as proof for or against an argument is ludicrous. With this in
mind, for me the debate on changing or not changing the definition of marriage
to include same-sex couples comes down to genuine issues of equality, human
rights, oppression and any form of genuine peer-reviewed scientific evidence of how sociologically such
a change could somehow be damaging for society. Considering this I was left
largely sitting on the fence. I’m not convinced of any good reason to change
the definition of marriage based on the above, and at the same time, I am not
convinced of any good reason not to change the definition of marriage. If I had
to lean one way based on the above argument it would be towards allowing the
amendment to go through. As it just has. I wouldn’t find it contradictory to support the government's decision to
affirm same-sex marriage while at the same time holding to the position that
this is not a theologically valid option for Christians. This too is a
discussion for another time.
So what then for Christians going forward?
Continuing with
the metaphor or exiles the challenge becomes twofold. Firstly not to assimilate
into the culture that surrounds, and secondly, not to become so pre-occupied
with self that one cannot see outside of one’s self to re-think, re-imagine and
re-describe larger reality. As Brueggemann says, “Self-preoccupation seldom yields energy, courage, or freedom. In
ancient Israel, one of the strategies for coping shrewdly and responsibly beyond
self were the narratives of defiance and cunning that [challenged] exiles not
to confront their harsh overlords directly, but to negotiate knowingly between
faith and the pressures of ‘reality.’” Think of Joseph, Easter and Daniel
and the requirement of an endlessly cunning, risky process of negotiation.
Rather than
bemoan, belittle, protest, march against and prophesy doom gloom and doubt, (I
enjoyed this brief speech in parliament by National MP Maurice Williamson),
Christians must subversively write great songs, tell great stories, paint great
pictures, make great movies. All of which tell a different story, tell of a different narrative, that of God's hand at work in the world and of the love and grace of Jesus. A story that offers a different way of being in the world. We do this as artists using whatever medium comes most
naturally, but most importantly, as artists expressing oneself through the
canvas of one’s life. Your covenant of marriage is before God. You standard of
ethical living is before God. The way you raise your kids is before God. Therefore, live in such a way that you are
a credit to the message of Christ (Philippians 1:27). So here’s what I want you to
do, God helping you: take your everyday, ordinary life—your sleeping, eating,
going-to-work, and walking-around life—and place it before God as an offering.
Embracing what God does for you is the best thing you can do for him. Don’t
become so well-adjusted to your culture that you fit into it without even
thinking. Instead, fix your attention on God. You’ll be changed from the inside
out. Readily recognize what he wants from you, and quickly respond to it. (Romans
12:1-2)
In other words,
nurture your counter-identity. Live out the hope you have in Christ even amidst
a season of despair (which is not a reference to the marriage equality bill but
rather the reality that we live in the now-but-not-yet in which all has not
been redeemed and reconciled as it one day will be). Encourage one another to
live free “from the pathologies, coercions,
and seductions that govern our society.” Offer to one another the
encouragement and support that gives spine, resolve, courage, energy,
commitment and freedom to fully embrace and live out your counter-identity in
Christ. Live out the way of faith, hope, and love. Divorce yourself from
consumerism, materialism, individualism, narcissism and hedonism and embrace grace
freely given. Freely offer grace to those around you. Look forward to the “homecoming”
of God’s will on earth even as it is in heaven, the eternal hope, and live in
the light of that hope today.
In other words,
for God’s sake, don’t be so nasty! Let your light shine. You’re marriage isn’t
under any more attack or in any more danger than it ever was, nor does it mean
anything less. Love your spouse all the more. Love your kids all the more. Love
your family all the more. Don’t sigh and despair. Don’t point the finger and
judge. Don’t fire of Bible verses as if they somehow have sway in a secular
context. Love the world around you all the more. Speak love and grace and peace.
There is nothing to bemoan about the marriage equality bill being passed. If
you have gay family members that are going to tie the knot and they invite you
to their wedding. Go. Buy the best wedding present ever! Your lack of attendance
isn’t going to be the key to them finding faith. You’re a Christian, a Christ
follower. You are the church, the body of Christ “that lives as God's pardon in the world, with arms wide open ready to spoil
any wayward son [or daughter] with royal rings.” (Toby
C).
11 comments:
yes, western Christians no longer have the luxury of generally being in step with the cultural context. Love the article and especially the last three paragraphs.
Couldn't have said it better myself. Have some ideas, after much research, on Christian same-sex marriage which generally, I think, fits within the framework you've outlined. Have some across some very interesting stuff on 'both sides' but think it's a bit of holding the reality and the truth together somehow.
*come across
Sue Said. loved your article and couldn't have said it better .....
I read the Facebook comments but can't comment there because I am not your Facebook friend. We have always been "in the world but not of the world", but if we celebrate a homosexual union, isn't that putting our stamp of approval on something God clearly identifies as sin? Not that we hate homosexuals, (I hope, we have love for all the world and all sinners) but to approve their sin is not loving because it brings death to them. Two men joining in union does not damage my soul. it damages theirs.
There is a series by Francine Rivers. The mark of the lion series. A character called hadassah lives in a world not unlike ours, and the way she loves, lives her life, is an example that utterly humbles me. If u need a real Jesus perspective on how to live, and love those around u without compromising your christian faith, have a read of these books. First novel is titled "A voice in the wind" these books change lives. Please have a look. Great article by the way- Joanna
Thanks for the comment Harg. I’ve been asked that question a couple of times.
All I am suggesting here is that there are far better ways to speak out about one’s convictions, beliefs and faith than to decline the invitation of a gay friend or family member to attend their marriage. Loving and open dialogue would be a far better stance than to stay away as some form of protest. They don't hold to the same convictions as you and it is going ahead. So, in the interests of long term relationship and love don't burn bridges, build bridges. Your attendance is one of love not one of endorsement or agreement. They know your position so love them from that position. It's all the more meaningful. It's not about attending enthusiastically it is about loving genuinely. In short attendance is not approval. Jesus partied in all the wrong places, with all the wrong people. This was never approval. It was being salt and light.
Yes, and Jesus never said "Go ye, therefore and sin with abandon."
thanks for articulating this so well. agree 100%.
Very well written, thank you. Just the point I have been arriving at myself, time for grace and love to abound, being Christ in our hurting world.
Well said Joseph.
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